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First Time Couples: When the Rose Glasses Come off

First time couple on a date hugging each other by a lake

First time couples

After all your efforts, you have finally found someone you like and think you can be with for awhile, perhaps even forever! First time couples is an exciting and growing experience. Not only are you building a relationship with another person, but you are also learning about them, their habits, and quirks. While these quirks may be adorable or cute early on, they can quickly turn to annoying or immature later—depending on your perspective and experiences in the relationship.

Every relationship will experience conflict, misunderstandings, unforeseen challenges, and changes. As you grow in this new relationship, there are some things you’ll want to review and explore. Dr. John Gottman, a well-known couples therapist and researcher has found that couples can utilize crucial tools to ensure that their relationship remains strong throughout these experiences. These tools include:

  • Building a strong friendship
  • Sharing fondness and admiration
  • Turning towards each other, rather than away
  • Seeing each other’s choices with a positive perspective
  • Managing conflict appropriately
    • Talking about the issue
    • Taking a break when you feel overwhelmed
    • Validating your partner’s perspective
  • Creating a vision for the relationship
  • Understanding each other’s perspective and interpretations of experiences

 

Counseling for couples not married

Counseling for couples not married is something that many couples utilize when hard things come up in relationships. Contrary to popular belief, couples therapy is not something that you wait for until your relationship is on its way to divorce. While many couples do start couples therapy at this time, it is more advantageous for couples to come in sooner, rather than later. Dr. Gottman, also found that couples will generally wait six years on average before seeking help. Six years is a long time – it’s the difference between birthing a child and signing that child up for kindergarten, or your tween to become an adult, or completing both a bachelors and a masters within that time.

 

So why do couples wait?

Couples will wait to start counseling for couples not married for a variety of reasons. These include: one partner not being ready to commit or change, fear, stubbornness, lack of insurance benefits or financial resources, fear, clinician fit, poor couple communication, and not thinking the problem is actually—or even—a problem.

 

How does counseling for couples help?

Counseling for couples not married can help in pivotal ways. These can include:

  • Resolution of damaging communication patterns
  • Connecting with your partner on an emotional level
  • Better and more frequent sex
  • Better communication
  • Improved emotional and physical intimacy
  • Gaining clarity about your vision for the relationship
  • Strengthening your both your friendship and love for your partner
  • Recognize signs and symptoms for conflict and know how to respond
  • Moving past and healing from betrayal or infidelity
  • Talking about issues with an “uninvolved third party” in a safe space

 

Marriage counseling Wichita Falls Tx

Couples from all stages of relationships can benefit from marriage counseling. Whether you’re married, partnered, engaged, preparing for marriage, or separated, BridgeHope Family Therapy’s online marriage counseling Wichita Falls TX can help. Strengthen your relationship and enjoy some, if not all of the benefits listed above. Experience marriage counseling Wichita Falls TX online, from the comfort of your home or another convenient space.

Reach Out Today!

 

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